03.24.2020 Deep in COVID-10 Pandempic and a week after the EarthQuake

Wow.

The title really says it all for this one.
I know its been a while since i've been here, and i'm sorry to you Blogger for that.  Life has brought me here and then scared me away for many reasons.

But i am here just to document how i'm feeling right now, so later, on a brighter day i can come back and read it. I want to apprecaite things at all times, be greatful for our health and what we have every day.

Last weekend, a little over a week and a half ago, the United States declared a national emergency and so did Utah for the whole state. That means school was down for a 2 week soft closure to help stop the spread of the COVID-19.  Everything has shut down that is not essential to life. No mass gatherings, no concerts, no bar's, no zoo or aquarium, no dine-in at restuarants, everything except take-out and grocery stores. 

Utah is reated #1 in panic buying, so all the stores were struggling to keep up and nobody, i mean nobody had toilet paper. For some odd reason everyone bought mass amounts of toilet paper. Ridiculous really and sad for those people who actually need it.

1 week later it eased up a bit at the stores, but more closures, more cases coming in positive by the day.  The whole point of this self-isolation is to help stop the rapid spread of this crazy COVID-19. I can't talk foreeryone, but most poeple i know are taking it seriously and staying in as much as possible, we all need to do our part to protect those in our lives who are at the most risk from this virus.

The stores are stocking back up, but its still difficult to find toilet paper.
Schools shut down until May 1st, or futher notice, my prediction is they will be out until summer, but we will see what happens. Which that makes me work at home every day now.
It has its own struggles, it sounds nice to be at home all the time to work, but its really difficult to focus when i have two kids constnatly coming back for things and asking questions.  On top of that im supposed to be home schooling Rivers.  So we made a deal that after I work we have Homework and school time later in the day, we are starting that today and I will upate later how its working out.

The uncertainty is at the highest i've ever felt it. The uncertainty of what will happen next and how this will all pan out. Hosptials are running critically low on supplies and we are not even close to the peak # of cases in my opinion, we will see in a few days or a week how that looks.

As of last week on the 15th there was 7 cases, and just over a week later we are now at 285.  It was out there spreading already, so we should see a spike soon and all those precautions from last week and this week should start paying off. I just feel for the hospitals.

Last week we also had a 5.7 Earth Quake at about 7:09 AM in the morning.  I've never experieced that kind of panic in my life. I was out of bed so fast to get Rivers out of bed and safe.  We were up since them with 20-30 aftershocks in the first few hours. And a week later still feeling aftershocks. Talk about a unsettling feeling along with the anxienty of uncertainty COVID-19 is bringinng.

Twitch Partner Application Submitted

Today I officially submitted my Twitch Partner application after completing the Path to Partner requirements. 30-Day Statistics 87 Average Viewers 157 Peak Viewers 4,448 Hours Watched 51.1 Hours Streamed 13 Active Stream Days 68 New Followers 16 Different Games Streamed 7-Day Statistics 93.3 Average Viewers 116 Peak Viewers 973 Hours Watched 10.4 Hours Streamed 3 Active Stream Days 16 New Followers Community Metrics 80–100 Unique Chatters Per Stream Active Discord and Tavern community Custom Community Battles Tavern XP System Custom Stream Interactions and Events Consistent nightly streams Why This Matters The Twitch Partner requirement is 75 average viewers over a rolling 30-day period. At the time of application: I exceeded the requirement by 12 viewers on the 30-day average. My 7-day average was 93.3 viewers, showing continued growth. The community was actively participating with 80–100 unique chatters each stream. Personal Reflection What started as a small stream grew into Tizzy Tavern — a place where people gather nightly to play games, share stories, laugh, support each other, and be part of something bigger than just a broadcast. Today wasn't the end goal. It was proof that all the late nights, community building, custom projects, Tavern systems, events, overlays, and friendships created something real. Partner Application Submitted: May 30, 2026 🍻🏰

Every night.

The words i sleep on form the poems I dream on equaling my sweetest downfall.

Questions for Rivers at age 8

Asked Rivers (Age 8) all these questions about me

*What is something I say a lot?
"Rivers"

*What makes me happy?
Rivers

*What makes me sad?
"your dad that passed away"

*How tall am I?
6 feet

*What's my favorite thing to do?
Play League of Legends

*What is my favorite food?
Hot Pot

*What is my favorite drink?
Coke

*If I could go anywhere, where would it be?
Hawaii

*Do you think you could live without me?
No

*How do I annoy you?
By walking infront of the TV and dance

*What is my favorite tv show?
Watching League of Legends

*What is my favorite music to listen to?
Weezer

*What is my job?
Computer stuff

*How old am I?
36

*what's my favorite color?
Green

*How much do I love you?
To pluto and back 

Because I am a Dad.

Because I am a Dad...


When I was younger, in my 20's, I never did want kids. Maybe I was just selfish with my own time, with my dedication, with my passion and interests for my future.  I didn't know what true love was, what it felt like to live and breath. I didn't know.


When my son was born, I had no clue what kind of world I was stepping into. Sure, 9 months to mentally prepare, but we all know that's impossible if you've never been a parent before. And still I'm sure its hard after that when a new life sits in your arms for the very first time.  One day life is just as you know it and all of a sudden the next day it means so much more. Life changes. Life grows. Life won't stop and the only choice we have is how we handle this ride that is given to us.



I cry when he sings Christmas songs at school. I get nervous on his first day of class. I root him on when he's competing. My eyes tear up when I find a sock he wore when he was an infant.  I hug him before bed. I feed him breakfast in the morning. I make sure his hair is combed. I cook him dinner. I buy him school supplies. I help him with his homework. I play video games with him. We wrestle and battle in imaginary wars. We race to get dressed first. We race to brush our teeth first. We race to bed. We share the chores.  We take care of each other. We have each others backs. He loves me and I know it,  I love him and he knows it. And every single night before he falls asleep I remind him... he's my best buddy.


Life changes. Life grows. Life won't stop and the only choice we have is how we handle this ride that is given to us.

-- Stay Hopeful -- Stay Humble --

"Sometimes you've hit a low ... Stay hopeful.
Sometimes you're on top ... Stay humble."

Was a quote my nephew loved. He rode this quote while fighting a battle.
As unreal as it still seems he ended up losing this battle but he continues to reach and help in times I don't even realize it.

It was just the other day I was pretty discouraged. As I was talking to someone about how i was ready to give up on a few things but then i realized I need to stay hopeful and keep pushing forward. And sometimes I think I am much further along than I am, but I need to remain humble because i have a long way to go.

I didn't even realize what I said until my green bracelet i'm wearing was staring back at me with "stay humble".

It applies to life, it applies to goals, it applies to work, it applies to struggles and successes and it applies to love.

I miss you Landon Sparks :)

in for forever

On the fifteenth day the sun didn't hate us
The food wasn't angry, the bed didn't sigh
the ceiling said it's possible to get back
On the fifteenth day the sun didn't hate us

On the fifteenth day we danced the twelve-step
examined, admitted we are powerless
We sang a song about spring air
On the fifteenth day we danced the twelve-step

On the fifteenth day you played another show
The mountains arranged for you to run
The sea knew you would do your best
On the fifteenth day you played another show

On the fifteenth day came a drench of lonely
with a punk and a priest and a real estate agent
a girl with no teeth and a shaky marine
On the fifteenth day came a drench of lonely

On the fifteenth day we all hit a low
most of us probably never getting better
but never getting better together
On the fifteenth day we all hit a low

Today here we are the sun doesn't hate us
We are dancing the twelve-step together
Today here we are playing another show
We are in a drench of lonely together
Today here we are all staying hopeful
Tomorrow, together, we will stay humble